PLEASE VIEW THIS VIDEO BEFORE CONTINUING.
So…about a few months ago, I was telling one of my close friends about an issue that I was facing with a man that I was dating (and yes we all tell our girls our business, so get over it). I was telling her how pissed I was because at the end of our argument, he told me “sometimes I need to just shut up and let a man be a man.” Of course, what he really meant was that as a female, I need to back down and be submissive sometimes, while as a man, he should have the last word. After I finished going off, and complained to my friend that he was still living in the 1920’s, my friend kindly forwarded me this video.
For those of you who have viewed the clip, her message is simple. Women need to “Step back and let your man lead and be a man.” Women need to embrace the traditional roles of womanhood in a relationship—taking care of the home, cooking, taking care of children, loving and uplifting our men. She also kindly suggests that men aren’t off the hook and their traditional roles are to “protect, provide, conquer and provide a home for women to nurture.”
I would completely feel the message of the clip, except for one thing…Its 2009! Traditional roles just don’t make sense in our times. Women are not in the workforce working the same 9-5 that men do. What these traditional roles do is give women all of the work and men all of the benefit. I mean think about it, in the 1920’s, women could do all that stuff…why? Because they sat their behinds at home all day watching their 1900s soap operas. But now, it just doesn’t make sense. You mean I have to work the same 9-5 you do and in addition, be a cook, a chef, a personal maid and a mute? While the man does what exactly? Oh yeah, conquer, protect and provide…. Let’s discuss each of these, just so that I’m clear.
1. Conquer- Its 2009, what exactly are you conquering? The remote?!
2. Protect- Maybe this was more relevant when we lived in the wilderness with lions, tigers and bears, but not now. I don’t know about the rest of you ladies, but I haven’t exactly been in the need of protection so far.
3. Provide- Wait, aren’t we both doing this?
So, I guess my point is…this traditional submission idea, simply doesn’t have its place in the 21st century. It gives us all of the burden of being in a relationship and none of the benefits. What do you think?
So…Many of you have already viewed my initial blog titled “The Black Women: Truth or Ignorance,” where you listened to a Black Man air his stereotypical generalizations of Black Women. I personally could not see past his victimization of Black Men and his villinazition of Black Women. A lot of you, however, could and requested that I post part 1 and part 3 of his series so that everyone can get a full picture. Having now viewed all three videos, I cannot say that my opinion has changed. Are there a few good points spattered throughout the video? Absolutely. However, the man is convinced to counter every valid point with an equally, if not more ignorant one. Among his ignorant rants, he states that black women abandoned black men during slavery and the civil rights movement. DID YOU SEE WHAT I JUST WROTE? I mean really listen to this man. Dont get wrapped up in his occassional motivational speaking, or your personal experiences of being told “your just too nice.” In all three videos, self-blame is not only lacking, but not surprisingly, he shamlessly shifts it to black women. So, as much as I hate to further publicize any more of this man, without further ado…
